J.R.R. Tolkien was about 50 years old when he had an almost paralyzing experience of writer's block.
He was working on The Lord of the Rings, the monumental fantasy that has come to be regarded by many as the 20th century's most transforming work of fiction.
Tolkien was a philologist – an expert in the study of human languages. He created several new languages from scratch as a means of weaving a rich and realistic deep background for his story.
By the 1940's he had already invested decades in creating the many characters, subplots, and little details that would make the Rings saga come alive.
Then he hit the wall.
Hitler's armies had begun to sweep across Europe. The fate of his native England hung in the balance. Tolkien wondered if he would live long enough to finish his masterwork. The idea that he would leave behind nothing but stacks of pages was a "dreadful and numbing thought."
In the midst of his creative funk, he was struck by an idea for a short story. He called it Leaf by Niggle. It is the account of a frustrated painter.
The verb "niggle" in English means "to work in a fiddling or ineffective way...to spend time unnecessarily on petty details."
Author and pastor Timothy Keller writes, "Niggle was of course Tolkien himself, who knew very well this was one of his own flaws. He was a perfectionist, always unhappy with what he had produced, often distracted from more important issues by fussing over less important details, prone to worry and procrastination."
In the story, Niggle has one compelling dream. He wants to paint a tree.
And not just any tree. It will be a magnificent tree. Behind it there will be a beautiful countryside, a lush forest, and "mountains tipped with snow." He has imagined this tree for many years. His goal is to complete his masterpiece before he dies.
But life gets in the way.
He stops to help his neighbors. He wrestles with painting perfectly. But then, unexpectedly, death arrives. And his grand plans come to a screeching halt.
How much did he accomplish? Niggle was able to finish just one leaf.
It is perfectly rendered. But all that he leaves behind on his gigantic canvas is that one leaf. He dies in despair.
In the next world however, something amazing happens. As he journeys through the heavenly countryside, he sees a magnificent tree. Not just any tree. It's his tree – the tree he had always imagined, and to which he had dedicated his life.
It's not only Real. It's finished. It's whole. In this world he had been seized by a vision of something beautiful. He had worked on just a small part of it. But now he gets to experience its fullness.
Keller, before he came to the end of his own life’s work just last summer, provided this insight: "I've recounted this story many times to people of various professions - particularly artists and creatives - and regardless of their beliefs about God and the afterlife, they are often deeply moved."
Why is that so?
Most of us have been captured by a vision of something beautiful, something important, something real that we have longed to experience firsthand. Perhaps it is the healing of our shattered neighborhood. Or a personal reconciliation at our own Labor Day family picnic. Or the in-breaking of God's grace into every human life. Or lasting peace in Ukraine, Gaza, Syria, South Sudan, and the whole earth.
Our hearts ache to see such things. We may even devote our lives to help make them so.
But in almost every case, we will die before they fully happen. Maybe someone else will take up our cause. Or maybe not. Then one day the sun will burn out. Earth will disintegrate. And all traces of humanity, including all the memories of every generation, will be lost forever. And all of our dreams, our hopes, and our best efforts will mean nothing.
Unless God exists.
If God is really there, then our deepest dreams are not foolish. They are not in vain. They are previews of a reality that we will one day experience in its fullness. Even if we can accomplish only a very little, that very little matters forever.
"Therefore, my dear brothers and sisters, stand firm. Let nothing move you. Always give yourselves fully to the work of the Lord, because you know that your labor in the Lord is not in vain" (I Corinthians 15:58).
Tolkien was consoled by his own story. He was inspired to finish The Lord of the Rings, the ultimate expression of his deep Christian conviction that Good will one day triumph over Evil, even if things look dark in the present moment.
Perhaps you feel you have only one leaf to show for a lifetime of work.
Don't lose heart.
May God comfort you on this Labor Day that your most sincere and heartfelt labors are not in vain.
One day, by God's grace, you'll have a chance to climb in the very tree that's always been at the center of your dreams.
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